Wednesday, June 22, 2016

Is it a lie if it's unintentionally untrue?

I'm not sure, myself.  At any rate, Galaxy of Scars will be published this summer, and it is a whopper.  It's huge.  Gigantic.  Enormous.  And hopefully that will be alright.

I've had a lot of tough talks with myself about this book.  It is a lot of things I've never been particularly comfortable with, being a novel, foremost, and very cathartic, secondly.  It is absolutely a means of exercising some demons, without a doubt, which by nature also makes it self-indulgent and potentially rubbish.  But I'm publishing it anyway.  Because that is my nature.

I have a lot in common with all of these characters; I'm not a Richmond native, I wasn't born there, I lived there for 2 decades and made a break for it in my mid-twenties--so this gives me some things in common with some characters, others with others.  The reason this book exists at all is that I was also a big, white weirdo who was deeply in love with a beautiful black woman that ran off to New York and went to school as a genius prodigy while I stayed back in sweaty ole RVa and lost my mind.  That was a normal thing, in Richmond, at the time.  There were a lot of us in that situation.  We should have formed a club to manage our dysfunction, but instead I waited fifteen years to write a giant book about the feelings involved.  Catharsis!  This was also during the time when Richmond was murder capital of the United States, and I knew some people who were wonderful and who were murdered, senselessly.  I knew some murderers too, and that erases none of the sadness or senselessness of murder.  I hated the racism and poverty and gutting desperation associated with all of that death.  And this book is about that too, a little bit, or maybe a lot, because anything that talks about a real relationship in Richmond in 1998 is going to have to talk about that, particularly if it involves a couple made of black and white partners.  And I wanted this romance to be a bit real, the way the feelings I needed to sort through are very real; I wanted it to be mysterious, if not a mystery, I wanted all of the major players to be black, and I wanted it to be good.  Damn good.  But I loved it so much and was so emotionally invested that it might not be, and I will never know.

That is basically a great argument both against and for independent publishing.  On we go.

So I'm aiming for the end of July, and then I will probably sink back into hibernation; I have a couple other things I'm working on--the last "chapter" of the Harder series, a story about cousins who act like sisters who are bi-polar and B movie actresses, respectively, and the ever-expanding Mercyverse, which I will probably all publish at once (that's like 12 short stories and 4 novels, at this count, so no idea when that would be)... And this really dark fantasy trilogy about colonialism and mortality.  That's also going to be a while.  There's lots of sex in that one though,  Eh.  Anyway.

That is what I'm doing with my summer, Internet.  I hope you're good.

Look for that giant cathartic mess of a book at the end of July!  I hope it's good too.